April Showers
It’s a catchy phrase from a childhood rhyme, “April showers bring May flowers . . .” Gardeners love the promise of the phrase, as do the sales people in the gardening department at Lowe’s and various nurseries around town! I saw a sign that had the phrase and suddenly wondered about an old hymn I remember from long ago and far away.
Daniel Whittle lost his arm in a Civil War battle. While recovering from the surgery, in a prisoner of war camp, he looked for something to read. Someone gave him a New Testament. Reading it forever changed his life. When the war ended, he served for a time as the treasurer of the Elgin Watch Company in Chicago, but soon left that for full-time evangelistic work. He wrote 23 hymns before his death in 1901. Among them, “Showers of Blessing.”
The prophet Ezekiel tells us of a covenant between God and his people – He describes it as a “covenant of peace” and ends with the phrase “There shall be showers of blessing.” (Ezekiel 34:25-26) No doubt this passage was Brother Whittle’s inspiration:
There shall be showers of blessing; this is the promise of love;
There shall be seasons refreshing, Sent from the Savior above.
There shall be showers of blessing; Precious reviving again;
Over the hills and the valleys, Sound of abundance of rain.
There shall be showers of blessing; Send them upon us, O Lord;
Grant to us now a refreshing; Come, and now honor Thy word.
There shall be showers of blessing; O that today they might fall,
Now as to God we’re confessing, Now as on Jesus we call!
There shall be showers of blessing, If we but trust and obey
There shall be seasons refreshing, if we let God have His way.
Showers of blessing, Showers of blessing we need;
Mercy drops round us are falling, but for the showers we plead.
There’s nothing quite as refreshing as an April shower. . . Nothing quite as wonderful as being caught in the downpour of His showers of blessing and mercy and peace upon us. My heart’s cry is simple: “Send the rain!” Let there be showers of blessing – showers of blessing we need!
Published in categories: T.F. Tenney
OIKOS
Before you strangle on the caption for this article. Let me make a confession. It is a Greek word. I know very little about the Greek language but this is a good one. Colloquially translated, it simply means, “household.” It is used in the New Testament. It can mean your family, your servants. It could even be your friends. Acts 10:24 says that Cornelius called together his kinsman and his near friends. His “oikos” came to his home to hear the Word of God.
There’s no greater outreach than the outreach of family and friends. That’s the sphere of your influence for Christ and righteousness. All of us have family and friends.
I have often heard people say, “I can’t win anybody to the Lord.” Your greatest field of evangelism is among your own kinsman and your own neighborhood. Church Growth Incorporated, in a recent survey, revealed that evangelism is most effective when it is targeted at friends, family, and associates.
They made a survey of 42,000 lay people who had come to the Lord. Consider this:
- 75-90% of them became Christians through friends or relatives.
- At most, only 2% were won by visitation programs.
- Believe it or not, less than 1% were won through evangelistic crusades or television programs.
- Added to this, only 6% credited church programs with bringing them into the church.
Win Arn, in one of his books, made a classic observation. He said,
“Any Christian can accomplish oikos evangelism is he follows a simple set of guidelines: identify his “extended family. The extended family includes those non-Christians with whom he has a unique relationship. To effectively evangelize these individuals, he must listen attentively, relate to their needs, look for receptive periods, use appropriate timing, use understandable language (not Christian-ese), and be accountable to God.”
He observed that non-believers who are won to Christ by someone who is a genuine friend tend to become active in their churches and stay active. In one survey of 240 new Christians and 240 drop outs, 94% of the active believers stayed in church because of their friendship with the person who witnessed to them. On the other hand, 71% of those who dropped out did so because they viewed the evangelist as a salesman, not a friend.
There you have it! We have a tremendous field of evangelism at our fingertips. There are so many who are hungry for this born-again experience. There is no need to say they don’t want it. How do they know if they haven’t had a choice? Expose them to the real thing. Let them see the love of Jesus and the love of truth walked out in your life, as a living example of what a Christian ought to be. This oikos evangelism will draw them to Him.
Published in categories: T.F. Tenney
Love Will Find A Way
Several years ago – before downloads, MP3s, DVDs, and CDs - I received a cassette tape of a message by the above title shared by Jimmy Evans. It has come to mind again and
It seems in the past few years and months, I have witnessed a disturbing upward trend in the number of divorces in our churches and even among our ministry. For awhile, though the divorce rate outside the church seemed to skyrocket, it appeared that the Christian walk in someway insulated couples from this blight. Then, divorce came to the church and it is almost as rampant within the fold, as without. I have seen close at hand the devastation that comes with divorce, the broken-hearts left in the wake of infidelity, the children whose lives are virtually wrecked by homes that disintegrate against the onslaught.
I believe we serve a God who is in the business of restoring broken relationships, and healing troubled marriages. He is so committed to His love for us, that He gave Himself to die for our sins. Consequently, He wants us to be just as committed to Him, and the vows we have taken before Him.
The key to maintaining and nurturing a relationship, to restoring a relationship that is broken is sometimes quite simple: We must be willing to love and forgive – even when the romantic feelings have disappeared. It really is a question of commitment. The emotions will ebb and flow, but commitment will be what makes or breaks your relationship.
In counseling with various couples in the midst of marital turmoil I’ve hear a lot of non-viable excuses. “I don’t love her/him anymore. I should have never married her/him.” It seems to be the theme song of unhappy husbands and miserable wives. Emotional numbness and disillusionment lead individuals to speak horrible words to each other – words that wound and cannot be recalled. However, as Dr. Evans pointed out in his message, we must also remember God has given clear steps to remedy these situations. Steps that will help achieve and preserve strong and healthy feelings for one another, as well as keep, what Dr. Evans termed, “the romantic edge on our relationship.”
How can you stay deeply and romantically in love for all of your married life? When your marriage is in trouble, how can you restore the love you’ve lost?
Dr. Evans said this, noting his own personal experience with marriage crises: “The answer to both questions is found in Genesis 2:24. After commanding us to leave our parents, thus setting a standard fro proper priorities in marriage, God said: ”Therefore shall a man…cleave unto his wife”
When I noticed that word cleave during our marital crisis, I immediately pictured a meat cleaver chopping something into pieces. I thought, Yep! That fits with my experience in marriage so far!
Fortunately, the Hebrew word translated cleave does not mean “to cut or separate.” It means that opposite: “to pursue with great energy, to cling to something zealously.” When God told man to “cleave unto his wife,” He was commanding him to zealously pursue her and energetically cling to her for the rest of his life.
From the beginning, God has known the secret of staying in love: work. Marriage only works when you work at it.
The push that causes a marriage to begin a downward slide is not work, but the lack of it. Taking one another for granted and trying to “coast” through life on the sled of past memories creates an inertia that actually sets the slide in motion.
When I tell a couple they must work at their marriage for their marriage to work, I’m challenging one of their deepest romantic misconceptions.
Whether we express it or not, most of us believe the Hollywood lie that if we marry the right person, we should not have to work at the relationship to stay in love. It should just “happen.” After all, that’s how it is in the movies.
When someone tells me they’ve fallen “out of love” and do not want to continue in their marriage, I ask this question: “Do you resent having to work at your relationship with your spouse?”
After a few minutes of denial, they usually answer something like this: “Yeah, well, I’m sure I haven’t been doing as well as I should have for some time. But now I don’t even feel like trying!”
Not trying–that’s the place where many marriages break down.
Think back to your first date with your spouse. How hard did you work at impressing your date? How much time did you spend preparing yourself physically? How careful were you with the words you spoke? How much energy did you exert serving and trying to please your date?
You know as well as I do that we all “broke our necks” trying to impress each other that first time.
This shows clearly that it was not simply “chemistry” that caused your relationship to be so satisfying at the start. It involved hard work.
Just because you live in the same house or share the same checkbook does not mean you will have a strong relationship or even feel anything for your spouse. For the rest of your life, you must work every day at your marriage if you want it to be healthy. When you stop working at it, it will stop working for you.”
Another point, Dr. Evans went on to make was that a good marriage requires “Exercise.” He likened marriage is like the muscles in your body. When you exercise them regularly, your body becomes strong and attractive. But if you lie around and are totally inactive, your body will become weak and unattractive.
If you feel “out of love” today, as hard as it is to believe, it really doesn’t matter. Begin to work at your relationship; you will soon see feelings you thought were forever gone resurrected. Emotions can lead you astray and trigger wrong decisions. Don’t let them! Even if you have bad feelings toward your spouse, obey God’s commandment to “cleave” and God will heal your feelings.
You may object: “No, this won’t ever work. The best thing for me to do is just get a divorce and get on with my life.”
Consider this observation from Dr. Evans:
“If you divorce, more than likely you will marry again. When you do, you will work hard to attract a wife or husband. And after you are remarried, the excitement of the relationship will carry you for a while. But the day will come, just as it did in your previous marriage, when work and faithful commitment–not just emotions–must fuel the relationship.
Wouldn’t it be simpler to begin again with your current spouse? Why not just commit yourself now to the hard work needed to renew your relationship? You will get on with your life more quickly and easily than you will in another relationship after a hurtful divorce and the accompanying sense of failure. If you ever hope to have a happy marriage, you will have to commit to work at it sooner or later. Why delay the inevitable?”
Dr. Evans recounts several individuals he and his wife encountered in counseling situations. There was the man who had been married seven times and in the process of marrying yet again. The bride would be #8 for him. However, the reality was, the reason for each of the failed relationships was one simple truth: This man was unwilling to work at marriage. He had a pattern: He would meet someone, get excited about her, marry her, then, when problems arose in the every day of life, instead of working on his relationship with his wife, he developed an on-going relationship with his attorney! When trouble began, rather than working things out, he ran away from it. What he never realized was that the only way to get rid of a problem completely is to solve it, not ignore it or divorce it.
Dr. Evans’ message mentioned what he called “Three Steps to Renewal”: Perhaps you and your spouse are already losing–or have lost–your feeling and desires for each other. Perhaps you have wounded and damaged one another in the process. The good news is God has a plan to heal and restore your relationship.
Revelations 2:5 says, “Remember therefore from where you have fallen, and repent and do the deeds you did at first” (NASB). In this verse, Jesus was speaking to the church at Ephesus concerning the deficient state of their relationship with Him. Their love had cooled. Jesus’ instructions to the Ephesians are also steps couples can take to revive their love for each other.
Step 1. Remember therefore from where you have fallen.
Jesus did not tell the Ephesians to try to work up some emotion to restore their love for Him. The strength of true love is not emotion, but a decision of the will. In fact, the work most often used in the New Testament for “love” is the Greek word agape, which means “a commitment to do what is right for someone else regardless of emotion.”
Jesus commanded the Ephesians to first “remember” the place from which they had fallen–to recall their actions at the beginning of their commitment to Him. He did not try to get them to remember their feelings; He wanted them to remember their actions.
As it applies to marriage, this first step means remembering the joyous details of your actions and gestures at the beginning of your relationship, when it was so exciting. Remember how you honored the other person and were so sensitive in your speech? Remember how you did little things to impress him or her? Remember how you both thought of each other all day and anticipated and prepared for your times together?
When you have recalled these things, you are ready for Step 2.
Step 2. Repent.
The word translated repent in the Bible means to turn around, to do an about-face. This implies that we are going the wrong way and must change our direction. When we are losing the first love we once had for our spouses, it should be evident that we are doing something wrong; we’re going off in a different direction. Therefore, we must change directions to be healed.
When you remember the fervent actions and right attitudes you displayed at the start of the relationship, you must change any of your current actions or attitudes that are different from those in the beginning. When you have acknowledged the truth (revelation), admitted you are wrong (confession) and adjusted your direction (action), then you can conclude the process of restoration.
Step 3. Do the deeds you did at first.
Jesus did not say to the Ephesians, “You had better work up some deep feelings for Me right nor, or you are in big trouble!” He simply told them to act the way they did when their relationship with Him was new and fresh. In your marriage, you must once again invest your time and energy in the relationship–regardless of how you feel.
Dr. Evans recalled,
“When my wife and I began our healing process, the Holy Spirit led me to this Scripture and told me to begin pursuing Karen with energy and sensitivity, just as I had in the beginning. The only problem was that I had lost all feelings for her. Although we repented to one another and forgave one another, both of us had serious reservations about becoming emotionally vulnerable again. We needed to do something. Yet our feelings were telling us not to act–or to do the wrong thin. Finally we realized we had to stop listening to our unhealthy, wounded emotions and begin to obey the Word of God. Even though neither of us had any positive emotions or good feelings at the time, we began to do the things we knew were right for each other. The result? After just a few days we began to see significant changes in our relationship and in our feelings. After a few months, or marriage became deeply satisfying. After a few years, we were far beyond any height or depth of love we had ever experienced before.
Believe me, we’re not superhuman. Karen and I are just like you. I am able to share our story not because of who we are or what we did, but because God’s Word is true. If God can do it for us, He will do it for anyone else.”
I want to assure you that regardless of the state of your marriage today that if you will commit yourself, work hard at loving your spouse and meeting his or her needs–even if that spouse is not doing the same for you–you will begin to see a real difference. If both spouses will commit to working hard at the marriage – and will work on it every day – incredible results will follow.
I can assure you that while emotions will come and go, you will enjoy a stable and satisfying permanent relationship, and you will experience intense and deeply satisfying feelings. You will still have problems. However, as you remain steadfast and obedient, the problems will get fewer and easier to overcome, and your blessings will grow larger and more enjoyable.
Make a commitment to pursue your spouse with diligence. Make a commitment to cleave – not leave. It will not be hard, grueling work–but a labor of love.
Published in categories: T.F. Tenney
Help Needed!
Strength, self-sufficiency, and independence are usually admirable traits — especially in our self-help society. However, there are times help is not only needed but should be openly welcomed. It is true that Paul said “…every man shall bear his own burden…” but he also said, “…bear ye one another’s burdens….” (Galatians 6:2-5)
Perhaps it is significant that when the ‘burden’ becomes ‘burdens,’ Paul encouraged sharing the load. Even Jesus did not carry His cross alone. “…Simon a Cyrenian, coming out of the country, and on him they laid the cross, that he might bear it after Jesus.” (Luke 23:26)
The WNOP has strong and broad shoulders to help bear the burdens of many. Not only do we share personal burdens , but we are able to impact world events. Often we have missionaries tell us that the very week they were on the request list , they were especially helped and blessed.
Thank you – all of you- who consistently share the load and help bear the burdens of others by agreeing together in prayer for the multiple requests.
We are …”helping together by prayer…” (II Corinthians 1:11)
Published in categories: Thetus Tenney
SO YOU THINK IT’S FOR YOU
Pride is the most subtle of all sins. You may have heard me say before that pride existed in heaven before there was a devil. If it can get in heaven without a devil, it can get anywhere. It can even get into something or someone close to Jesus.
This brings me to one of Dr. Tozer’s allegories. He said, “It’s the first Palm Sunday and here comes Jesus riding into Jerusalem on a donkey. The crowd begins to shout, ‘Hosanna, Hosanna!’ The old donkey picks up his ears. Some in the crowd throw their coats on the road – others spread out palm branches. ‘Well,’ says the donkey, swishing a fly off a mange patch, ‘I had no idea they really appreciated me like this. Listen to those hosannas, would you – I must really be something.’”
Poor donkey! Didn’t he realize it wasn’t for him, it was for Jesus? Anytime people want to lift you up for something you have accomplished in the Spirit, just remember, you are nothing but the donkey Jesus is riding. Don’t think the applause is for you.
How God longs to bless us – but He longs to bless where His reputation is safe. I have seen men who were quite knowledgeable of the Scriptures. That’s a great thing. There’s a difference in having confidence in the Book and confidence in my knowledge and interpretation of the Book. The last time I checked I believe that latter attitude is called pride.
Everything we do is to be to the glory of God. Glory is only safe when deposited at the feet of Jesus. So, often we frustrate because we think our place is too small. “How could I ever have revival here?” Did you ever stop to consider that this all began in a manger? What’s any smaller or more insignificant than that? God glories in taking the insignificant and using it. Then He is assured that we and others will say, “Thine is the kingdom, the power, and the glory.” Be satisfied where you are, to the glory of God!
Warren Wiersbe said, “If God wants you to leave, He has a place for you. But if God wants you to stay, He has grace for you.” It may be that the insignificant place you feel you are was designed by God to develop you. Being satisfied, even with little, is an enemy of pride. I want to embrace every enemy of pride. I don’t ever want to be a donkey carrying Jesus thinking the people are lifting me up.
Eddie Rickenbacker was once asked what was the biggest lesson he learned after a crash at sea, and from drifting about with his companions in life rafts for twenty-one days in the Pacific. “The biggest lesson I learned,” he said, “was if you have all the fresh water you want to drink, and all the food you need to eat, you ought never to complain about anything.” What a thought! What a truth!
We are living in pivotal times. God has a place for all of us. May we be satisfied with little or much. If God is in it, that’s all that matters. Someone well observed, “Hang on! Your mess will be your message. Your test will be your testimony. Your trial will be your triumph!”
All glory belongs to Him.
Published in categories: T.F. Tenney